My children are half Italian and half Singaporean and from the time we had to fill in their details on the birth certificate forms till now, we’ve been struggling with how they fit into these unwieldly categories. Technically they aren’t Eurasian because their dad isn’t, so for now they are just in the hold all category of “others”. Then there’s the matter of ethnic costumes… every time Racial Harmony Day rolls around, we always get requests to dress Luca in a national costume. My husband makes a funny face and wrinkles his brow, but no good Sicilian national costume comes to mind, so one year he went in a Thai outfit, and this year we are debating between a Punjabi suit and an Italian soccer jersey….after all, they didn’t really specify whose national costume.

But I have to say, when we think about the list of countries we could see bringing up the kids in, Singapore always ranks pretty much near the top. It’s hard to find a country that accepts biracial or multiracial kids with no questions asked, with hardly a second look. Perhaps it’s because we are ultimately a nation of migrants, travellers, post-colonials, expats and converted heartlanders. I say converted heartlander thinking of my husband who has learnt how to negotiate the public transport system, knows the difference between a five room improved and five room advanced flat and enjoys durian and claypot rice. Most of all though, he’s started to see this as a second home – coming back from Italy the other day he mused that he was strangely happy to see Changi airport.

It’s different in Italy where a lot of emphasis is placed on a homogeneous Italian culture and race. There, foreigners are still often viewed with apprehension and skepticism. I remember the first time I went to the smallish town where my in-laws stay and how I nearly caused a little boy to fall off his bicycle because he had never seen a Chinese woman before. I think some of the people we encounter in the supermarket still think I’m the domestic help! And while mixed marriages like ours are on the rise, they aren’t viewed with the same acceptance as they are here.

Of course, it hasn’t always been a bed of roses – we’ve had our lot of bureaucratic problems and people who think all women who marry foreigners are sarong party girls! But by and large, most of the people I meet are happy for us and for our children, that they get to have unique views and insights to two cultures. For show and tell at Luca’s daycare recently, we sang some Italian songs to Luca’s class and it was great to share something different.

I produced an interview with overseas Singaporean author Wena Poon the other day on Primetime Morning and a term she used really struck me. She talked about “larger Singapore”, about enlarging the physical borders of Singapore to include those Singaporeans who have made their lives overseas. For me, I would include the Singaporeans who have chosen to enlarge our perceptions of country and belonging even from within our borders. Whatever happens, I’m sure that my sons will always be able to call this island home.